I have been silent for a while cause I stumbled across, or more like it was pushed under my doubting and denying nose, the possibility of being in a narc relationship. Narc? What the heck is narc? Well, it is a narcistic …. I think you might be thinking at this moment ‘hold on a sec, those are easy to recognize. Why would you possibly fall for someone like that?’ Or ‘nee, he is a nice sensitive guy’…. 

I had been give a pseudonym – Spartan life coach- by someone who is getting out of an abusive relationship herself and who does care for me as if we were real sisters. I looked up. 

The more I heard/viewed of the guys page and his fb videos ( admit to having seen just 4 for now.. Can’t digest more ) the more my heart trembled and the more I was going ‘ wtf? How come he knows my mother so well… Furthermore how on earth he know my husband inside out’. 

I’m still at the doubting stage and I am about to go see some friends recommended Psychologist just to be sure my diagnose is correct. 

It turns out narcs are foremost very clever and they often masquerade as sensitive introverts… You might be going now just like I was ‘come in again?’

Well, for now I won’t be spilling anymore beans. I will let you look it up on the net (narcistic personality disorder). I am embarking on a strange and scary journey. Unknown is ahead of me. I still can’t grasp the whole of it. For if it is true that would mean I behaved archetipically … Escaped one abuser to fall into hands of another equally potent and clever and equally heartless .. Believe me I would rather not discover I have been that silly and blind .. Yet I had no other pattern … The only ‘other’ there was ascaped 18+ ago causing the worst non physical suffering I have ever experienced.